Now I'm posting this before 8pm on the night of the Royal Rumble. So I may be off a bit, but I'm starting to see some trends and I thought I'd like to put them down.
1. Sheamus : This man is so white he oughta be sponsored by Crest Extra White... Dude is seriously pale. Now I'm ok with that, on the whole I find too many men in wrestling are over tanned... Also, dude is scary. But in a really cool way. I wouldn't be surprised to see him eventually go over as a face. His heel cred is minimal, sure putting Jamie Noble "out" was interesting to see. Hell maybe overdue, he never really got over, not his fault I'm sure. His in ring work was good. His look was good, maybe a bit on the small side for Vincent "Frankenstein" McMahon. We know he loves monsters (eg Kane, Undertaker, Sid Justice, Andre the Giant, Big Slow, Big Boss Man... The list is endless really ) and more talented small men end up on the mid card or jobbing to lesser talents.
If I could paraphrase a line from one of those more talented small men Mr. Lance Storm :
Can I be serious for a moment. Sheamus is a monster, and impressive, but not a great worker. Still better than John Cena and HHH, by far.
2. ECW... Wow where to start. The Mad Scientist of Extreme Paul Heyman would roll over in his grave if he was dead watching the crap WWE is calling ECW. I can remember getting grainy VHS tapes from friends, downloading matches online anything to see the blood, violence, and just spectacular workrate of the men and women in ECW. A lot of people tell me it was nothing more than Blood & Guts. I preferred to think of it as Blood, Sweat, and Tears.
3. TNA. I've seen a bit of TNA over the past few months, and I can honestly say the product has neither become better or worse since Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff joined... Maybe they are really only talent. Maybe they weren't lying... Then I woke up, saw Sean Waltman, and Scott Hall on the first PPV. TNA Genesis. Yikes... What else to say. The PPV was actually pretty good on it's own. But you could feel and smell the influence of Hogan and Bischoff. Now granted I doubt many of the issues I'm seeing are actually related to either men at this point. But I think I may be biased against them. I'm gonna give it some time before I make any judgements.
4. Now we come to my big point of this post. Royal Rumble...
Some easy predictions...
- Women's Championship Match
- Michelle McCool vs Mickie James
I don't really care... Women's 'wrestling' in WWE is goofy... It's essentially lingerie models rolling around in the ring. However Mickie James is something special. I'd like to see her go over.
- ECW Championship
- 'Captain Charisma' Christian vs Ezekiel Jackson
- I've been a fan of Christian since 'The Brood'. Big Zeke Jackson is a monster, and I'm sure if Mr McMahon has his way there will be a new Champ and Ezekiel Jackson will be going over. But I'm going with my heart and saying I think Christian will retain. Likely because of interference from Vladmir Kozlov.
- WWE Championship
- Sheamus vs. Randy Orton
- I think it will be Orton going over Sheamus. I'd love to see Sheamus go on to Wrestlemania as Champion and face CM Punk. But I think Orton has this one wrapped up. Over the last few weeks he's been all over TV, soaking up time. Where I don't think Sheamus can cut a promo in a believable fashion. I love the kid, but I think this is match will end with an RKO 1-2-3.
- World Heavyweight Championship
- Undertaker vs. Rey Mysterio
- Ok so is there anyone that really thinks Rey Rey will be winning tonight. Deadman goes over after punishing the smaller man, Rey Jr. will get some good offence in, will make it look close but Undertaker goes over leading to another showdown with Shawn Michaels @ Wrestlemania.
- Royal Rumble Match. 30 man over the top rope battle royal. My head says Shawn Michaels, HHH or John Cena. My inner booker says let's get Ted DiBiase Jr, Kofi Kingston, or Yoshi Tatsu in the main event @ Wrestlemania. But that would mean letting some fresh blood on the top tier.
Think they will throw in the Diva's Championship somewhere too but really?!?
- Maryse vs Gail Kim.
- Battle of 2 Canadian Ladies. But really Maryse looks like a 2 bit stripper from Montreal. Gail Kim has class, talent, and charisma. If wrestling was not scripted, I'd say Gail Kim goes over. Maryse is Blonde, and honestly not hard on the eyes. I think we have a stripper as our Divas' Champion, not that it means anything.
Anyway it's 8:10pm. Time to drop this post and we'll see how I did on my first attempt at reading the mind of the comedy writers in Connecticut.
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